Self-Care for Moms: Letting Go and Doing Less
Being a mom is a hugely rewarding journey, but day-to-day can be overwhelming, and it’s easy to forget to take care of yourself. Rather than adding the obvious self-care tasks to your to-do list, (Exercise! Eat well! Book time for a manicure!) caring for yourself can also take the form of doing less.
It's okay to let go of cultural expectations of the mom who “does it all” and embrace a mindset of simply doing enough. Here are some practical, achievable tips and strategies that can help create balance and refocus on what’s important in your life. Remember, you’re doing an amazing job even if you feel like you’re doing the bare minimum. Taking care of yourself now will only help you do better in the long run.
Start with rest
You may already know that rest is the foundation of self-care, but if you’re a new mom it’s nearly impossible to get a full 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep. The trick is to get rest whenever and however you can: Ask your partner or a family member to watch the kids while you take a nap. Maybe you can book a sitter to allow yourself a well-deserved morning of sleeping in.
The biggest challenge is to avoid tackling your to-do list once you’ve bought yourself some free time. Leave the dishes in the sink and prioritize rest instead. Remember, doing less while well-rested is far more beneficial than trying to do it all on limited sleep.
Forget perfection
Let go of the pressure to be perfect in every aspect of your life. Instead, focus on what’s most important each day: If you need to work late to finish an important work project, you probably won’t plan, prep, and cook the most nutritious or photo-worthy meal that same night — that’s totally OK. Let the living room stay messy if it means spending a little more time helping the kids with their homework.
There will be days when it seems nothing went quite right, but remember that “off days” are part of the process. Get some rest (see above) and approach the next day with a recharged perspective.
Fall in love with saying no
Women in general, and especially moms, are socialized to make everyone around them happy. This means we end up saying “yes” to a lot of things we’d rather not do. Learning to say “no” can be liberating. Prioritize your well-being by saying “no” to non-important requests and invitations that may drain your energy and time. Focus on what truly matters to you and your family, and say “yes” to activities and commitments that align with your priorities. By setting boundaries and valuing your time, you'll have more energy and resources for what truly brings you joy.
Don’t compete with your former self
It's easy to compare yourself to a previous version of you. Maybe you used to run marathons and now you barely have time for a walk outside. Remember that circumstances are different now but that doesn’t mean you won’t be able to refocus and challenge yourself again in the future. Nothing is permanent, so accepting that some things need to be put on pause while you’re actively “momming” is key. One way to shift your perspective is to remember that kids grow up quickly — being present now instead of thinking of all the other things you “should” be doing will give you greater peace of mind.
Outsource, delegate, and ask for help
You don't have to do it all alone. Delegate tasks and responsibilities to your partner, family members, or trusted friends. If you’re able, consider outsourcing certain aspects of your life, such as meal planning, grocery shopping, or household chores. Look at your responsibilities as a family CEO and seek assistance wherever possible. Remember, it's not a sign of weakness to ask for help—it's a testament to your strength and self-awareness.
Tune out the noise
In this age of social media and Insta-perfect “momfluencers,” it's easy to fall into a trap of comparison and self-doubt. One simple scroll through your feed can make you question how you feed, speak to, bathe, and clothe your kids. Remember, there are people and businesses who profit from you feeling inadequate, so unfollow those accounts and opt-out of "mom guilt" culture.
Talk to someone
There may be times you feel like you’re doing everything you can, but the emotions are still overwhelming. If so, you are not alone: A recent Harris poll found that 42% of surveyed working mothers were diagnosed with anxiety and/or depression last year.
Not unlike childcare and household chores, you can lighten your mental and emotional load by asking for help. Cerebral offers online therapy with top-tier experts who have flexible appointment times (days, nights, and weekends), so you can easily fit this essential care into your busy schedule. And don’t worry if you don’t see results right away—it takes time to sustainably elevate your mood. Our new Strong Start packages help you make the commitment to reach your mental health goals. Start by taking a free assessment.
We hope this helps you prioritize what matters and care for yourself by doing less. And if you’re a mom who chooses to optimize your mental health with Cerebral, know that we’re here for every step of this incredible journey.
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